PS To Esther Post

Rape within marriage is another concept recognized by Jewish law that the modern world is still coming to terms to. Summed up beautifully in a paragraph lifted from this article: http://www.yuobserver.com/features/the-jewish-perspective-on-sexuality-1.2470356#.TuFGjF3XI24

"What exactly is part of the man's mitzva of onah? He must begin by conversing with his wife, utilizing light, easy, loving words, of praise or otherwise (Brachot 62a notes that Rav chatted lightly and joked with his wife before having intimacy) (Friedman 90). He should hug and kiss her and otherwise "please his wife and arouse love between the" per R' Yaakov Emden (Friedman 92), be physically close to her while unclothed and even after intercourse, he should "continue to chat lightly and lovingly with her in order that she not think that his whole intent in speaking this way earlier was for the sake of his own pleasure" per the Damesek Eliezer (Friedman 83). It goes without saying that a man should not force his wife to be intimate with him if she does not wish it; indeed, "[e]ven if she is unwilling to have intimacy simply because she is temporarily angry with him or she happens not to be inclined at the time to have intimacy, he must not force her and have intercourse with her against her will while she fears him.And even if, after having just had intercourse, he wants to have intercourse again and she is not agreeable to it, it is forbidden (see Eruvin 100b)," per R. Yeshaya A. Z. Margaliot (Friedman 60). The same concept is reiterated by the Magen Avraham, Ravad, Rami b. Chami and Meiri."