This was just too funny not to share:
http://jezebel.com/5831751/anne-hathaway-performs-anti+paparazzi-rap-song-on-conan
Also, news which, pre-SATC movies, would have been greeted with "yay!", but now makes me a bit more ambivalent: http://nymag.com/daily/entertainment/2011/08/could_sex_and_the_city_return.html
Now, on to polygamy:
http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-4100434,00.html
I am going to start off with something controversial: While I support a legal ban on polygamy because of the way in which it is used to oppress women, and I think to some extent, women's wanting to be in polygamous marriages may reflect an internalization of mysogyny, I also think a) that some women may want to be in a polygamous marriage for perfectly "legitimate" reasons b) it is possible said women have not internalized mysogyny (or at least, not any more than the rest of us) c) to claim otherwise is patriarchal. I have no right to claim a woman's marriage is illlegitimate just because I think it is. To claim that all women in polygamous marriages must somehow be opressed or have been coerced into it is to objectify them by denying them any autonomy over their own actions.* Furthermore, some may claim that the legal ban on polygamy is just one more way for a patriarchal male society to control women's bodies: If one man helps himself to more than his fare share of women, that's not fair to the other wife-seekers out there.
In light of the amount of cheating that goes on, judging polygamy becomes a bit hypocritical. Furthermore, some might claim polygamy prevents cheating, and is akin to having a mutually agreed upon "open marriage", only even better - because the open-ness is limited to a few partners, to stable partners who you know, so you don't wonder which woman your husband will pick up at the bar tonight. Of course, this open-ness is only one-sided, which may make it unfair - but in many open relationships, one spouse is the one who really wants the open-ness. Furthermore, if the woman doesn't feel the same need for other sex partners, but her husband does, isn't it her right to grant him that to save her marriage?**
Now, on to social problems reflected in the article:
1. The "polygamy is great for Jews" ads were funded by desperate single women. While some of these women may be desperate of their own accord, one wonders how much of their desperation stems from their belonging to a society in which one does not gain full acceptance into the community sans marriage, in which communal life focuses around families with children, and the single are shunned and pitied. Furthermore, if these women are observing shomer law, being single must be especially hard - out of mercy, a prime Torah value, maybe rabbis should look into at least easing shomer laws for women over 30. However, to do so would only reifie the message that single women over 30 are to be pitied, so I feel ambivalent about my own suggestion. Of course, I am in general, in favor of rabbis easing shomer laws for everyone by allowing women to go to mikvah starting in puberty, which I also think is beneficial for religious reasons that have nothing to do with sex.
2. I think my assertion is strenghened by one woman's claim that her fear of not being able to have children prompted her to support the ads. Having children is part of the path to acceptance in Orthodox society; it was this path that she sought. (The treatment of childless couples is another serious issue Orthodox society must deal with). Alternatively, or at the same time, there is the legitimate longing to be a parent, for oneself, because one wants children. It is a shame that single-motherhood via IVF and adoption are not considered acceptable in Israeli Orthodox society, the way that they are considered acceptable in Modern Orthodox society in New York. This woman should not have to choose between singlehood and motherhood.
3. The article mentions Biblical examples of polygamy, including Solomon's wives, but his wives were seen by the Tanach as his downfall, and there is a ban on the king having too many wives. I would argue that reading in between the lines, while the Torah allows polygamy (or at least bigamy - I don't think three wives are ever mentioned in the Torah's legal code), the Torah and Nach have a negative attitude towards polygamy, which comes out in its tone.
4. At least the man interviewed seemed to think it essential to have wife a's consent before taking wife b.
5. The whole "did times change" / "how can our Torah be wrong" exchange however, is what troubled me, because the view of times changing/halacha adapting to said changes, and the aboslute right-ness of the Torah, as being mutually exclusive, is troubling.
* Similarly, to claim that women who dress modestly for religious reasons must somehow be opressed or have been coerced into it is to objectify them by denying them any autonomy over their own actions.
** Of course, this works off the sexist assumption that women desire sex less than men, which is not true.
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