Personal is Political - Right?

Every time I come to a family event or a social affair, I know my weight will be commented upon. It is usually in a positive way, but it still bothers me: The minute you tell me "You lost weight. You look good", you make me afraid to eat that second slice of turkey. I don't think this pressure is unique to me - most women I know tell me their weight is frequently a topic of discussion - even a three-pound loss or gain is cause for compliment or censure.

I confess - at this point in my life, if I entered a room without getting compliments on my weight, it would make me really nervous and unconfident - the way I once used to take it as a sign of something being wrong with me if I didn't get catcalls when I walked down the street.

But I mean, how screwed up is that? Yeah, it's partially me giving into society - but how screwed up is our society?

I think measuring a woman's worth by her weight is related to our society's general lack of recognition of a person's unique worth qua human being - instead, we judge people by two numbers: Their weight and their bank account. Say what you want about Judaism, but at least it judges people by their words and their actions, which are much more important - and that standard is much less objectifying both of men and of women.

I recently saw a Dolce Gabbana ad featuring a (very hot) nude man. The ad was for a clothing brand, yet it did not bother to clothe its model - it was selling the concept that if you buy Dolce Gabbana society will perceive you like this hot presumably rich guy, and repsect you the way it does him, and then you will get laid and get your next promotion - because in our society, we are told looks and money are the key to happiness, and this becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy - studies show that there is discrimination against people perceived to be overweight or "ugly", that does indeed make it slightly harder to get that promotion, and they must compensate with other qualities. I think it is terrible that this discrimination is not being actively fought, the way that other types of discrimination are - then again, the entire concept of "beautiful" is essentially a social norm- in the times of Rubens, being slightly zaftig was considered pretty. So I think there are two tasks ahead of us: 1. To form a societal definition of "beautiful' that accomodates more women (and men) and more types of bodies 2. To fight discrimination against people who don't fit that definition.

I'd say let's do away with a definition of beauty alltogether, but given that texts defining beauty have been around since ancient times, I find that goal very unrealistic.