An Imperfect and Unauthorized Translation of a Letter by Yeshayahu Leibowitz

I have a book that I think is unavailable in English, but very relevant, so here is my imperfect translation, from: רציתי לשאול אותך, פרופ ליבוביץ: כתר הוצאה לאור, ירושלים, 1999

For more info on the book, please go to: www.keterbooks.co.il

For more info on Dr. Leibowitz, please go to: http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/biography/yleib.html

The Honorable Prof Leibowitz much greetings:

It is incumbent upon me to apologize for stealing his time, for certainly he has more essential things to busy himself with. But my personal problem that has religious and emotional aspects does not allow me to consult with just anyone. Therefore, I turn to him.

To sum up, I am a son of a chassidic family (my father is no longer a chassid) that survived the Holocaust. From the time I could think, before I had even identified it to myself, I was pulled towards males, a fact that causes me much physical and emotional suffering in my path as a yeshiva student who lives in a dorm.

From the day it became clear to me I was homosexual, I stand at a crossroads. (I already was liberated from the army and it is up to me to find my own way.)

The dilemma is how I can combine the religion of Israel with male homosexual sex?

The religious conflict was wonderfully expressed by a Hebrew poet in the 13th century, by the name of Theodorus Abulafia, who wrote:

In my innards, a fire is formed, that burns my deer of grace,
in his mouth is my lot, desire.
Our permission is not close and my eyes
are in the garden of Eden but my heart is in hell.

By the way, it is interesting that a similar conflict was not the lot of the Hebrew poets from the same time period like Judah the Levi and Shmuel the Nagid…

Even though I have heard a little of your method that claims that the homosexual sexual desire is a need that one should give up on, for the sake of the of service of God, which is a value. For me, this desire is an essence that stamps its seal on my life in general and on my romantic life and the mitzvot regarding this specifically. Many great leaders of their generation, including the Rambam, do not accept this decree of determinism and are convinced it is in the power of man and his will to overcome this but according to my humble opinion, that was before people understood this problem and its nature, and the spiritual fear of dealing with this, for "a stranger can not understand".

I will be very grateful to his honorable professor is he will answer me his opinion on this topic.

Thank you.

Hi,

I feel in your words the deep internal struggle you are engaged in, and I admire your sensitivity in turning towards me - but I doubt I can help you.

You are from among the people that it was decreed upon them the hard decree to be faced with a test, and even though not everyone has the strength to withstand the trial , he is is not free to stop trying. In tests that tested the strongest personal interests and desires, Iyov and Avraham stood strong, and that is a great feat. I, who was not tested with these kinds of tests and did not prove my ability to withstand them, am not allowed to demand of men the same strength that was not demanded of me. But you are not standing in my judgement, and not in the judgement of other people. This is an issue between you and your Maker who gave you the Torah, and you can not escape personal obligation.

If "the religion of Israel" is in your heart and in front of your eyes, and you are asking, "How can I combine that with male homosexual sex?" (your words) that answer is very clear and simple and does not leave room for deliberations: This combination is not possible - the Biblical commandment on male homosexual sex is explicit and does not leave an opening for permission. It is included in the three things (just three things!) that are in the realm of "if a person tells you they will kill you unless you violate the prohibition, allow yourself to be killed rather than violate it". If in the realm of service of God it is demanded to give up on his life, how much more so is it demanded of him to push away his desires, even if those desire are an "essential stamp that leaves its seal pun his life.". It is logical that he who accepts upon himself the yoke of serving God, accepts that he will have to undergo suffering and difficulties in his life, but but to counter them he has the knowledge that he is preventing himself with "of brave strength are those who do the word of God" - the highest level a man can attain.

Who am I go give you advice? I can only remind you of the seriousness of the decision placed upon you, and it is all placed upon you, no one can help you.

But I can bless you the difficult blessing, "chazak ve-ematz", be strong.

Yeshayahu Leibowitz

I remind you of the words of our sages of blessed memory, "If a man see his evil inclination is getting the better of him, he should go to a place where they don't know him, and do what he wants, but not desecrate the name of God in public".