Seeking A Lesbian Voice

Recently, an Orthodox version of the "It Gets Better" video has been circulating throughout the internet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytzzq9rwhQA

The video is only men, as was a recent controversial panel about homosexuality in the Orthodox world. Even "Trembling Before God" features mostly gay men, and not women.

Where is the lesbian voice in all of this? Is it merely a continuation of the invisibility/silence of women, in which a man speaks and is assumed to do so on behalf of a universal "mankind", with women being left in the margins, either assumed to be subsumed by mankind and male-normative culture, or being assumed to not belong to mankind - and hence made irrelevant by her lack of membership in male society, since male society = human society? (Wow. I really want to whip out the Simone de Beauvoir at this moment....)

Or is this something deeper? Halachikly, lesbianism is less "forbidden" than male homosexuality. The latter is mentioned in the Torah as an outright prohibition*, while the former is merely frowned upon by the rabbis - as probably are much of the practices in MO society - co-ed hanging out, watching TV which is arguably violating "and do not walkin in their ways", etc. So then why harp on homosexuality?

I believe that lesbianism is more of a threat to the heteronormative patriarchy, because it negates the need for a phallus (in this regard, strap-ons don't count - they are not an organic part of a male's anatomy). Male homosexuality poses no such threat, so it still falls within the phallocentric norm.

But this should not affect the Orthodox world, because as mentioned earlier, the Orthodox law is more anti-male homosexuality - maybe because subverting the norm is more threatening when it involves penises, since they are considered so important, whereas lesbianism, since it lacks a phallus, is considered inconsequential. (Think about our modern language - one must have "balls" to accomplish something, even if one is a woman.) Or maybe it is another case of the silence of women.

But either way, that lesbianism is more taboo in Orthodox culture than male homosexuality shows how much Orthodox culture in the US has absorbed American bourgeiois values. if one looks at much of the homophobia in the Orthodox world (which is thank God decreasing day by day) it has a halachik basis, but much of the tone and character of modern American homophobia, and owes much more to Western culture than to the Jewish religion.

I do not have an answer to these questions, but would like to end with a few thoughts on the recent controversy about homosexuality in the Orthodox community:

Certain issues tend to absorb other issues. In the past, "women's issues" were a convenient way to measure one's attitude on the relationship between Judaism and modernity. Thus, one's opinion about those issues was not about the issue itself, but about this general relations between O and M, and women's issues were a manifestation of one's opinions about that relationship, and a convenient test-case by which society agreed to measure those opinions.

Homosexuality and issues of gender and sexuality in general tend to be those issues that absorb other larger issues and become a test-case for those issues by society. Think of interacial marriage as a test-case of a society's tolerance** Think of the male gay liberation movement in France in the 1960s that was also about liberation from bourgeios values, and anti-colonialist while at the same time appropriating the language of Orientalism and turning the male gaze onto men in the colonies in a way that today would probably be considered racist. One could argue that this anti-colonial homosexual literature took on a fetishism on its own. And it was all male-centric and actually at point clashed with women's lib and lesbian lib movements. The point is, a) it may be time to difffrenciate between male and female homosexuality in order to erase lesbian invisibility - and no, Kate Perry singing "I kissed a girl" in order to turn on the male masses who equate lesbianism with good threesomes does not count as "lesbian visibility". b) the reason homosexuality is such a big issue in the Orthodox world is that it is not just about homosexuality, but about how Orthodoxy should engage in modernity, react to scientific evidence, and engage the Other, as well as other big issues.

I think the concept of feeling like an Other or feeling pressure to conform is fear that anyone who is part of a society or a strong community can relate to, because that is the nature of societies. Maybe this is also why the issue has become so big - feeling outcast at certain points is I think an issue most people can relate to on some level.

* 1. Only anal sex. 2. It says "as one lies with a woman". Can one ever really lie with a man as he lies with a woman? Also, anal sex is considered "not in her way" ie not the way one lies with a woman, by the rabbis, so then shouldn't anal sex not violated the prohibition since it's not the way one lies with a woman?

** A flawed test-case, but that's for another time.